December 5, 2012

12 Days of Cookies: Day the Fifth
( Oatmeal Cream Pies)

I wanted to spell the name of this recipe "Creme."  With that accent like the French use.  You know.  The backwards one.  Grave?  Aigu?  I don't know.  It's been almost two years since I took French.  It was only my minor, after all.  Who can remember that far?

The point is,"creme" is extra-classy (what with being Frenchified), while "cream" is just something that comes out of a cow.  "Creme" seemed to be the way to go.  And then I remembered the hell of trying to make an American keyboard make foreign punctuation, and decided that I'm not really such a classy girl anyway.

Besides, there's nothing inherently classy about an oatmeal cream pie.  It's not about the class.  It's about oatmeal.  It's about cellophane.  It's about He-Man lunchboxes.  And it's about filling squeezing out onto your fingers.

Oatmeal cream pies aren't the typical holiday cookie, sure.  There's no icing, no food coloring, and nary a thumbprint.  But I made them this year because they mesh so well with the primary emotions of the holidays: childhood nostalgia, comfort food, and unadulterated joy.  Try not to be joyful while eating an oatmeal cream pie.  I dare you.  And when you fail, don't feel bad.  Just lick your fingers and grab another.

Oatmeal Creme Pies
 very slightly adapted from Theresa
 at The Craving Chronicles

Unsalted Butter [ 1 cup ]
Dark Brown Sugar  [ 3/4 cup ]
Sugar  [ 1/2 cup ]
Molasses  [ 1 tablespoon ]
Vanilla Extract  [ 1 tablespoon ]
Eggs  [ 2 ]
Flour  [ 1  1/2 cups ]
Salt  [ 1/2 teaspoon ]
Baking Soda  [ 1 teaspoon ]
Cinnamon  [ 1/8 teaspoon ]
Quick Oats  [ 1  1/2 cups ] 

Very Hot Water  [ 2 teaspoons ]
Salt   [ 1/4 teaspoon ]
Marshmallow Cream  [ 1 jar - 7 ounces ]
Shortening  [ 1/2 cup ]
Powdered Sugar  [ 1/3 cup ]
Vanilla Extract  [ 1/2 teaspoon ]

1.   Heat oven to 350 degrees.
2.   In the bowl of a mixer, cream Butter, Brown Sugar, Sugar, Molasses, Vanilla and Eggs.
3.   In a second bowl, mix Flour, Salt, Baking Soda and Cinnamon.
4.   Add Flour Mixture to Butter Mixture.
5.   Mix Oats into Dough.
6.  Drop tablespoonfuls of Dough onto ungreased cookie sheets.
7.   Bake until edges just begin to brown, 10-12 minutes.
8.  Cool completely.

9.   Place Salt in small bowl.
10.   Pour Hot Water over Salt and stir until Salt has completely dissolved.  Set aside to cool.
11.   In the bowl of a mixer, combine Marshmallow Cream, Shortening, Powdered Sugar and Vanilla Extract until light and fluffy.
12.   Add cooled Salt Water to Filling and mix to combine.
13.   Sandwich cooled Cookies with a healthy dollop of Filling between them.                   

[Note: this amount of filling might seem meager to frosting monsters like myself.  You might want to consider doubling it.  What could it hurt?  Worst case scenario, you have to eat the leftovers with a spoon in front of the Doctor Who Christmas special.  Less than tragic.]



  1. Ooh, you had me at cream! If I may, I’d like to invite you to submit your photos to the new YumGoggle, a photo sharing site with the philosophy that if you worked hard to cook it and photograph it, we should show it off! Hope to see you there soon!

  2. these look great. one of my faves!

  3. These were always my favorite cookie growing up!

    1. I know, right? Just the thought of that crinkly plastic wrapper makes me happy. :)

  4. Love this recipe! Will be linking back to this in my upcoming post :)

    1. Looking forward to it, Marla! Can't wait to check it out.

  5. Loved this: "It's not about the class. It's about oatmeal. It's about cellophane. It's about He-Man lunchboxes. And it's about filling squeezing out onto your fingers."

    Yes! We're rounding up childhood favorites on the Shine Supper CLub this month, and a recipe like this would be absolutely perfect. I hope you'll join us!

    1. Thanks, Sarah! It's always so nice to hear that someone liked your turn of phrase. :)

  6. Ok, it may not be Christmas time, but ANYtime is Oatmeal Cream Pie Time! Can you clarify- for the frosting- " shortening" to you is... Crisco? I've been trying to get a cream filling recipe that works, doesn't sieze up, isn't runny,etc etc ( can you tell I've tried a few?!) so wanted to clarify what you used for " shortening". Thanks!!

    1. Oh no, Tamara! I'm so sorry - I don't know how I missed your comment. Yes, shortening would be Crisco or any other similar brand of vegetable shortening.